Le Crush 100 – Daddy Issues Personified

Baby ten ounce Jesus I have just come across, not on, one of the most entertaining sites I have seen in a while. It’s actually a blog but I despise the word, that’s sole purpose is to express some girls ‘crushes’ hence ‘Le Crush 100’ – I take it she’ll put 100 up, if she can stop at that.

I was pointed in its direction by our boy Rudi from Ashtray Electric who, according to the chick (I imagine it’s a girl – though I could be wrong) is a man whore – a terrible lie by the way. You simply have to check out this site, it’s hilarious. There’s a bit of me in her (not literally). She falls in love…a lot.

Here’s a sample:

“ALAS!!!! I don’t know who you are but I saw you at the desmond gig and DAMN you’re fine…! Find me, mysterious gorgeous soldier angel guy.”

I know! It’s too good.

Check out some of her best (read: craziest) work after the jump.

On Chris Slabber

“Wow, you lost a bit of weight in the Howard Roark days, eh? Sexy piccie tho. I hear you hang out at Shack a lot – maybe I’ll make it my next haunting spot – drinks are cheap enough to even hang there every night until i accidentally bump into you. I can go and watch LAN play but you don’t actually play that often, do you? Your last set at Assembly was amazing. I wanted to jump on stage and squeeze you. You have a very sweet smile. I think you’d make a great dad.”

Skirts Front Man Jeremy

“Ah, Jess, Jess, Jess. I used to stalk you at Dirty Skirt gigs, keep the flyers, keep the stickers, but damn you guys play a lot. Keeps a gal’s wallet clean. Maybe I’ll start surfing so I can stalk you, Tim Harris and the Goldfish guy at the same time.”

On Niskerone

“You singlehandedly got 600 tired Ramfest fans to pick up their broken legs after Pendulum and get them jamming till 4am. That’s pretty impressive. You have big nostrils, but that’s ok – you’re still cute, and your hair is pretty unique. I go to Fiction, but if you’re not playing that night I’ll leave. I take Vredehoek taxi’s because I know you do too. One day I’ll accidentally bump into you on a taxi. Maybe the mama’s can squish us closer together.”

On Dom – Goldfish

“Wow. That blonde top, those doe eyes…you make not only my knees go weak. And you play like, a million and one instruments. That is so hot. Goldfish plays too often and all over the place for me to stalk you at your gigs, but I do know where you live. I can do drive-by’s and leave flowers outside your gate. I, too, have short term memory issues so when I meet you again I’ll remind you of that and you’ll know we have something in common. Do you go surfing with Tim Harris? I hope so. I’d be able to kill two stalks with one visit. Why is that other guy always in the photos with you?”

Bit harsh on Dave, but he is married.

Honestly though, I am in hysterics right now. This chick is amazing, granted she’s a stage six clinger and we need to lock this shit up and get the hell out, but I think I’m in love. She is just like me. In and out of love like it’s a goddamn pair of jocks.

Go there now – CLICK HERE.

Not sure why I’m not on the list though, I mean, we were in the Electro Dome after Pendulum at Ramfest, together…I’m confused.

I’ll find her soon.

Nash…
Out.